Christmas 2012 Gifts

With the clarity of hindsight, we look back and see the significance of past events. With this perspective, their importance can seem obvious, a moral to our story outlined like a curriculum. For an idealist like me, the past may even be tinted with a sepia glow: the tedium of the daily grind is forgotten, the challenges, hurts, and confusion are seen now in the light of lessons learned, and all that remains is the good, the beautiful, the meaningful.

I was reminded of my tendency towards this retrospective optimism by my Christmas gift from Catherine this year. As a complete surprise to me, she worked for dozens of hours on compiling photos and blog entries from our 2006 South African family adventure into a hardcover table book (via www.mixbook.com). It is a stunningly beautiful gift and a loving tribute to our shared experience.

It is not an exaggeration to call that trip life-changing for us as individuals and as a family. It was our first (and so far only) visit to the continent of Africa, a place that has been described as dark and poverty stricken, but that we found to be rich with deep history, bursting with verdant life, and full of amazing people with hope for the future. It was also our first experience with longer-term volunteering, homeschooling, living in community, and participating in community development.  

Obviously, as I read through our blog entries now, I am struck again by the magnitude of what we were experiencing together. Written with raw immediacy, the posts nevertheless hint at a reflective understanding of the events unfolding. Now, almost 7 years they were written, the significance of those events is even clearer: were being challenged to grow and learn, and we can see how we have grown and learned in the years since.

Yet I also recall a conversation with my good friend Mike in September 2010 in which I questioned whether our family adventure had been worth it. Focused on the frustrations I was feeling at the time, I remember quite seriously wondering if we would have been better off not going to Africa. My frustrations were real: feeling displaced in a wasteful society that focused on accumulation of wealth, stuck in a job where I felt stymied, disconnected by busy-ness from a church community that had begun only a few years earlier with such high ideals, torn by the challenges of parenting two teen-aged daughters, and wondering whether my marriage and my sanity would survive it all. Those feelings were also very real: frustration, disappointment, confusion, loneliness, even despair.

So I am reminded that the trajectory of our lives is not always forward. More specifically, I am reminded of the magnificent and terrible gift of free will. My daily choices, especially about where I focus my thoughts, may determine whether the challenges of life overwhelm or strengthen me. Whether I ultimately walk a path towards maturity or towards bitterness may depend simply on my ability to choose which path I choose.

Yet I am also reminded of the glorious gift of grace, given when I’m at my weakest. For that conversation with Mike was no accident. It was the deliberate gift of a friend who knew I was hurting and chose to spend time with me. I have received similar gifts from Mike many times…and from other friends and family members.

Truly I receive these gifts daily. Catherine and I recently celebrated 23 years of marriage, more than 8400 days in a row of receiving the gift of her love and commitment.

In fact, every day that the sun rises and warms our planet, we all receive this gift of grace, camouflaged as another ordinary day. I am reminded of our first day in South Africa, riding in a van from the airport, gasping and commenting on the wonder around each corner; meanwhile, our chaperones, having grown up there, seemed immune to the beauty all around them and may have even rolled their eyes at us. How often we see newcomers and children revelling in the everyday wonders that we have missed: clean water from a tap, the formation of a snowflake, the whoosh of geese flying overhead, or the touch of a spider’s web.

Today, I celebrate my family and their Christmas presents to me, the gift of good friendships, and the Giver of our everyday gifts of grace.

Reflections from home

Yes, we are home and back into the responsibilities of work and school! Mike & Deb met us at the airport on Saturday evening with birthday cupcakes for Micayla (baked by her good friend Madison).

After being away so long, we are often asked, "How was it?" This question encourages us to stop & reflect on what an incredible blessing these last four weeks have been...a truly fun family vacation, an escape from the Canadian prairie winter and immersion in the warmth & beauty of creation, time to relax, read a book slowly, swing in a hammock, explore the ocean, experience new places and cultures, and of course, opportunities to volunteer, coming face-to-face with both need and excess.

We met many amazing people, too many to list, but we won't soon forget the hardworking people of Punta Gorda (Wanda Lee, Alex, Allan, Miss Elena, Marvin, etc.), the friendly folks of Punta Blanca (Joe & Betty, Paul & Charlene, Ralph & Gerry, etc.), or the kind staff at Fosters (Daniel, Miranda, Foster, etc.). It was a special privilege to get to know the newest member of our extended family, Carlos, and to meet his family, enjoying boat rides with Harlan and Marvin, tasting Miss Claudina's famous traditional island cooking, celebrating Christmas Day and New Years Eve in their home.

And of course, what a gift to be able to reconnect with Stephanie, Ed, & Jami. We've gained new respect for the challenges that they face, the perseverance they exemplify, and the impact they have on those around them. Thanks for showing us around and introducing us to many people and organizations. You generously gave us your time, opened your homes, and most importantly, shared your hearts with us.

Yesterday, Cathy discovered a farewell letter that Jami had stashed in our luggage. She asked me to read it aloud at suppertime: not an easy task through misty eyes as we remembered our time with you and the lasting impact you have had our on lives.

Addicted to Violence

This isn't a post about our experiences here, although it certainly applies in Honduras as violence seems to be a part of the culture for young men here. Three years ago, a friend gave me a small but powerful book by Parker Palmer called Let Your Life Speak. Then a few days ago I saw this powerful interview with him over at Mike Todd's blog:

It's easy to stand back and condemn violence in others. For example, I could piously criticize the revenge killings that seem almost commonplace in Honduras or the role that America's military plays in the world.

But Parker Palmer's words remind me that the violence issue is much broader, deeper, and more personal than simply war and security. My daily choices about the food I buy, the trash I produce, and the way I treat my neighbours and family are part of the same addiction. His "addiction" descriptor reminds me that to live as a peace-maker, I need to wake up to the problem of violence in myself. I need to daily admit my own lifelong struggle with this addiction.
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By the way, lots of rain here...and we are now on the west end of the island trying to enjoy the beach!

Island fun

In spite of significant hours spent visiting and helping along on various projects, we've also had time to enjoy and explore the island. It is no exaggeration to say that Roatan (especially the Easr end) is possibly still one of the most unspoiled and largely uncommercialized Caribbean experiences one can find. We keep asking Ed and Jami if we should be telling people the truth of how beautiful it is here, because it might cause a steady stream of guests for them! That's not to say that there are no challenges. The bugs do bite, food and supplies are pricey, significant crime is a factor, and the high humidity means you never feel quite dry or clean. But, when I read this morning that it's pushing -25 in Calgary again, all of that seems a pleasure in comparison!

We have taken a couple of hours here and there to hang out at various resorts in the area. If you order a drink or a sandwich on the beach, it usually gives you unlimited access to the resort's beaches, pools, and amenities. We've also been out on the water several times in various boats. Ed and Jami own both a small motor boat (built by Carlos for the occasional quick snorkeling trip or general transportation), and a big beautiful cruiser that they hope to turn into a sideline business to provide some income while they continue to work at community development projects. The big boat was vandalized back in October and was out of commission until just this week. On Monday morning, the weather was bright and sunny and the sea was calm, so we packed up a picnic lunch and headed out past the Eastern tip of Roatan to the Pigeon Keys, a series of smaller islands. After over an hour of speeding over the water and then traversing a channel of mangroves, we came to a beautiful deserted island that is the stuff dreams are made of! We anchored the boat and spent several hours snorkeling and sunbathing. We could walk the complete circumference of the island in about 10 minutes and find fish, birds, crabs, huge conch shells, coconuts, and flowers galore. What a day! We almost couldn't bring ourselves to post pictures of it for fear of incurring the jealousy of those at home. But, we decided to take the risk. ;o)

On New Year's Eve we rang in the new year with Carlos's family in their little house on wooden stilts on the bay. Various siblings, cousins and extended family dropped in for Carlos's mom's famous conch soup (a delicious chowder), homemade coconut bread, and cassava cake. It was a traditional island feast! I think we Gringos (white folks) provided the entertainment by getting everyone in on some games of extreme Uno! We also brought a bottle of champagne to split between about 15 of us at midnight and counted down the final seconds to 2010 under the full moon. It's amazing to think that with Steph and Carlos's marriage, our family now extends to Honduras. It's been such a privilege to come to know and love our island family. Dan thought it was pretty funny when Miss Claudina (as Carlos's mom is known) kept telling me that dinner was ready and I should come and serve my husband! I complied with a twinkle in my eye, but told Dan not to get too used to being waited on. Miss Claudina herself does not eat until her husband and sons are finished eating!

Today we are leaving Ed and Jami's home (where we've been staying for 10 days) and are moving to the West end of the island. It has been such a privilege to stay with Ed and Jami. They have truly let us into their lives and hearts. They face so many challenges here, as one often does when trying to do good, but they are a blessing to many and a true example of Christlike love. They have faced robbery and vandalism of their home and boat, financial challenges, miles of bureaucratic red tape, health issues, and loneliness to name just a few obstacles. Huge thanks to you, Ed and Jami, for putting up with our invasion on your lives. We love you dearly and support you all the way.

To our friends and family back home, we wish you a wonderful start to 2010, and year of all the blessings and challenges that God has waiting for you. In 2010, RISK more than others think is safe, CARE more than others think is wise, DREAM more than others think is practical, and EXPECT more than others think is possible. Happy New Year and new adventure everyone!

Pandytown Clinic

On Tuesday and Wednesday, Catherine had the unique privilege of being able to observe, volunteer, and assist at the local clinic in Pandytown, a village on this (the east) end of the island. I'll let her blog more about it, but wanted to post some of the photos and video. Micayla helped create the QuickTime video below using iMovie on Jami's laptop. We've had many difficulties in posting it, but I think we finally got it on YouTube.

Today, Cathy and the girls will drive to the west end of the island to visit a clinic and an HIV/AIDS infant hospice there. Thanks to Stephanie and Carlos for helping to set all this up!

We are hoping to celebrate New Years Eve with them tonight, but the rain is currently impacting our plans. As usual, we'll have to take each our as it comes.

Peace & joy to all our friends and family this new year.

Facing our fears

The Lord of the Rings is one of my favourite books, and Jessica and I have been watching the movies that Ed & Jami own. It's a grand adventure embarked upon by unwilling heroes whose courage to face their fears, weaknesses, and inadequacies are exactly what make them succeed.

Sam: It's like in the great stories Mr. Frodo, the ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were, and sometimes you didn't want to know the end because how could the end be happy? ... Those were the stories that stayed with you, that meant something even if you were too small to understand why. But I think Mr. Frodo, I do understand, I know now folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going because they were holding on to something.

Frodo: What are we holding onto, Sam?

Sam: That there's some good in the world, Mr. Frodo, and it's worth fighting for.

By definition, adventure involves risk. It's why we love adventure and why we (sometimes) avoid it.

We have all had to face our fears a little on this trip: lost luggage, foreign food, language barriers, large birds, biting insects, large hairy spiders (yes, that is a tarantula!), snorkeling, etc. I wonder which Cathy thinks is worse...the underwater creatures that she can see or those she can't! :-)

Of course, it is easy to trivialize someone else's fears. Personally, I (Dan) have had to face my own fears of ineffectiveness or inadequacy. But at the same time, I have been given plenty of reminders of the the opposite...like this quote by Mariann Williamson:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

Merry Christmas!!

Well, it does not seem much like Christmas Eve in this beautiful tropical paradise! It's currently about 29 degrees. But, we have some Christmas decor up and Josh is singing Christmas tunes as we make final preparations for the party we'll be attending later this afternoon. A couple from Germany who has lived on the island for years is hosting a large international gathering of expats at their home. This will allow us to meet even more of Ed and Jami's friends. As we've found in the past, there's something special about holiday gatherings of random folks who are all far from 'home' and far from family!

Tomorrow we will travel by boat to Carlos' family's house to experience a traditional island Christmas with them! We've been told by many about Carlos' mom's amazing cooking abilities, and we're looking forward to finally meeting his extended family.

Yesterday, after a morning of work, Ed and Jami took us to one of the nearby reefs for some snorkeling. It was incredible! This island is known to have some of the best dive sites outside of the Great Barrier Reef, and we got a small taste of that yesterday. The most exciting siting of the day was a large Manta ray (about the size of a kitchen table). I must say that I was glad it wasn't me who saw it since I tend to prefer swimming with creatures smaller than myself!

So, as we go into the festivities of the next few days, we will be thinking of all of you at home. We are loving every moment here, and yet will miss traditions like handing out stockings downtown on Christmas morning with our SSA friends, and carving up a turkey with family back home. Being in a 'developing country' again has reminded me of the extravagant blessings that we take for granted in Canada. And yet a Christmas without all the commercial trappings is so beautifully simple.

From our family to yours, Merry Christmas! We love you and wish you every blessing. As our Christmas card to you, take a moment to listen to my current favorite Christmas song. It's my wish for you this Christmas.

Helping with the Bathroom Project

One of our discoveries here has been how many projects Ed & Jami are actually involved in. Over time their reputation spread. I suspect that people in the community recognize they are reliable, hardworking, and committed to community development, without being overbearing or paternalistic. So they get recruited, usually as project managers or general contractors.

But the project that we've always read about on their blog, because it is their largest commitment and because it is the one that is actually being funded by folks back in Canada, is the bathroom project for Punta Gorda school. It is coming along well and looks like it will end up being one of the nicest washrooms on this end of the island. Wilmar and Oscar, the contractors who did most of the work, including the tiling, are essentially done now, and won't be back until the new year for some final touch ups. But there is still a fair bit of clean-up, plumbing, detail work, sanding and painting that needs to be done, so we are fortunate to be here in time to help with some of the final stages.

We've all been down there helping in various shifts. Below are two photos and video of the morning that just Cathy and I were there with Ed. Did we mention that we had 3 straight rainy days? However, yesterday and today have been beautiful.

More about the thrift sale

Read Ed & Jami's blog for a more complete perspective here.

The view from the deck

As can be expected when traveling, we've had our share of technical difficulties.  As a result, many photo opportunities were missed, and others were taken with a camera that we won't be able to get pics from until we get home.  However, here's a few from our deck that Cathy snapped with her phone.

We'll have a blue Christmas...

It's Sunday morning, and we're thinking of our SSA community back in Calgary, and the Christmas  pageant happening there this morning.  We are truly (well, kinda...Ok, not really) wishing we were there with you.  Thanks to all the parents who put up with interruptions and created costumes & sets.  Thanks to all the kids who have memorized lines, dressed up in silly outfits and put themselves "out there." And, Sam, thanks for all you have done to make it happen.  No matter how it turns out we know it will be a raving success!  

We found a Caribbean Christmas CD here and put it on this morning.   As it played "Blue Christmas" it reminded us of how we are missing you all.

Of course, when it played "Let it snow" we remembered the advantage of being here for Christmas! :-)

So much to be thankful for...

It's 5:30pm on Friday as I begin to type this.  I'm sitting on our deck, the sun has set, the breeze is blowing off the ocean, and the light is fading fast.  Our large deck is renowned in this part of the world...when we describe where we are staying to locals we hear, "Oh, the place with the amazing deck!" or "Where the last full moon party was held!"  It is a beautiful spot.  The far edge of the deck hovers about 10 meters above the rocks below, and from there is probably only 3 meters of sand and rock to the ocean....literally spitting distance if the prevailing winds weren't coming the wrong way.   Of course, it's a good thing they come the way they do, as they keep our house cool and keep many of the bugs away.

We are truly spoiled to have this place in Punta Blanca.  It's not a rental property, but when the owners are away, they allow friends (and family of friends) to use it for a great deal.

Seems impossible that we left Calgary exactly one week ago and have been in Roatan 6 days already, but that means a blog entry is long overdue.   There will be no way to summarize the incredible adventures of this past week, but here are some of the highlights:

• Jessica's worst nightmare came true at Houston airport when all of our luggage went missing.  We spent five hours touring from United to Continental to Taca and back again, through the very large George Bush Intercontinental Airport.  We eventually had to divide and conquer...they went to the gate to meet Cathy's incoming flight from Calgary while I tracked the luggage down and met it coming in from San Fran.  With minutes to spare, we all met up and scrambled to get a boarding pass for Cathy onto our flight to Roatan .  By the way, J & M handled the excitement extremely well, especially considering we all were working on about 3 hours of cramped airline sleep.
• The landing on Roatan was breathtaking.  We all leaned over those with window seats to catch a view of this jungle jewel in the middle of the Caribbean.  
• After Ed & Jami served us supper in their home (along with Steph and Carlos), they brought us here (to our new home).  It was long after dark, and we were exhausted.  As we were getting ready for bed, the power went out.  It was a moonless night, and we couldn't see a thing!  Fortunately I had my headlamp along, and after some searching (and one radio call to a helpful neighbour), we located some candles and matches. 
• On Wednesday, I enjoyed a boat ride with Carlos that I will always remember.  Awhile back, Carlos built a fiberglass dory for Ed; that's Carlos' business and he put all his skill and expertise into this little boat.  We decided to bring it from the south side of the island (where Steph and Carlos live) to the north side (where our place is).  With only a 15hp engine, that means a 90 minute end run around the eastern tip.  There's one point where the trip involves going outside of the reef into the open ocean, normally for only 10 minutes, but it took us about 30 as we managed to time it to coincide with the biggest squall of our time on the island...accidental, of course, but we could not have timed it better!  Carlos grew up on this water and he as good at driving the boat as he is at building it.  I never felt unsafe, but we did get soaked to the skin and Carlos lost his sunglasses to the driving wind and rain as he navigated us over 2m swells.  My butt is still sore!  As Cathy accurately predicted to Steph while were gone, "If Dan comes back alive, he'll have had the time of his life!"
• Probably a good thing that I did survive, as Wednesday was also our 20th anniversary!  As the girls hung with E & J for the evening, Cathy and I visited a local East End restaurant known for great food and beautiful views.  What a place to celebrate and give thanks for 20 amazing years.  
• Thursday morning we were up early for the "thrift sale".  This was the means devised to distribute some of the relief items that so many of you back in Calgary have generously donated. E & J really poured their hearts (and many days) into ensuring this day was organized, equitable, valuable and fun for the people of Punta Gorda.  By partnering with local churches and community leaders, they were able to give first dibs to those families who needed the items most.  We have previously seen first hand that dignity is removed and greed is fostered when goods are given away for free, so by charging a nominal price for the goods, parents were able to purchase Christmas gifts for their kids with their own money: everything was valued and everyone experienced love & respect.   We'll try to post some photos soon, but it really was AMAZING day.
• Speaking of E & J, we continue to be impressed by how well-respected they are in the community and how many great projects they are involved in...many more than we imagined or read about through their blog. It is a gift to connect with them, meet their friends, and see up close the work they are passionate about.
• We also continue to adjust to 'island life' and learn new things here.  Many of the sights and smells trigger memories of our time in South Africa.  If did not have that experience, it would be harder to adjust to the differences in food and banking, the bugs, the language barriers, and the ever-present economic differential between rich and poor.  Because of past experiences, our girls are quite comfortable and willing to try new adventures.
• Please keep Cathy in your thoughts and prayers.  She has been quite sick for the past couple of days with a flu and fever.  Yesterday she participated in the sale, but went straight to bed when we got home.  Today she stayed home and rested all day while Micayla and I made yet another run to the airport (45 min. each way) to check if our missing suitcase has caught up with us yet.  No such luck.  It's our third time there, and the answer is always "mañana" (tomorrow!).  At least there's nothing on that suitcase that we can't live without.
• Yesterday afternoon while Cathy slept, the girls and I grabbed our masks and snorkels and headed out in Ed's boat.  We moored to a buoy that marks the cut line through the reef...probably only 500 meters from our home...but it was our first glimpse of the underwater marine paradise that we are surrounded by.  Roatan is a mecca for divers, and we can't claim to have experienced more than the tiniest fraction of its beauty.  But in those 90 minutes of remaining sunlight, and probably only 20 square meters of near surface water that we could explore, we saw enough of the wonder and majesty of creation to know that we have lived a privileged life.
• Tomorrow looks like it will include Jami's Saturday morning basketball clinic with the neighborhood boys, then a few hours of work on the washroom project, and then perhaps an afternoon excursion to the West end of the island.  But, things are hard to plan around here, so we are learning to take each day as it comes.

It's now 4.5 hours later than when I began, and I'm sitting in bed while the rest of the house sleeps.  There's so much more that should be written, but I'll stop to get some sleep myself.  We think often of our friends & family back home and appreciate the emails and notes we have received.  Keep 'em coming.


Dan

A quick hello from Roatan

Just wanted to let everyone know that we arrived safely.  We had some adventures along the way, of course, but all arrived together and on time.  Our luggage mostly did too, in spite of some indications that it might not.  I say mostly because we are still waiting for one suitcase.


We feel incredibly blessed.  This place truly is beautiful and we are well cared for.  The house that Ed and Jami found for us is amazing.  More on that another time.


Time is short as the power is out on the island this morning, as it has been several times since we've been here.  Cathy, Micayla, and Jessica have already gone for supplies, while Ed and I are heading to the school in Punta Gorda shortly.


Dan

We go...

"...as pilgrims, not tourists; as learners, not teachers; as listeners, not as talkers."  Trevor Hudson

Whither Roatan? and other FAQs

As friends and acquaintances have heard about this upcoming trip, we often get asked the same questions:

• Where is Roatan? It’s part of Honduras, one of the bay islands about 80km north of the mainland. 
• You can see it on a map here. 
• Is this a vacation? Yes
• Roatan is a Caribbean island!  Have you experienced the weather in Calgary lately?!
  
• Is this just a vacation?  No
• We have three purposes for the trip: vacation, visit, and volunteer. In some way, it's the ideal vacation for us a family right now.  We feel like we could really use a break and some time to relax.  We all love the ocean and the beach.  But we also want something more purposeful than your standard tourist destination. We wanted a trip that each of us would enjoy and where each of us could feel useful.
  
• Who will you be visiting? Cathy's brother Ed and his wife Jami, as well as our niece Stephanie.  
• We are also looking forward to meeting Steph's new husband Carlos and his family.
• What kind of volunteer work? We are looking forward to simply joining Ed and Jami in whatever projects they are involved in.  They moved to Roatan over a year ago to become part of the community and have a positive impact.  I'd encourage you to peruse their blog (listed under LINKS on the right), especially the entry from 19Feb2009 that gives a good overview of their approach.  
• I (Dan) am particularly looking forward to seeing the washroom project they are currently working on.   
  
• And if it works out, I know that Cathy would love an opportunity to put her 2nd year nursing training to use doing some basic medical work while she is there. 
  
• Is this where you sent the container?   Yes
  
• Many of you heard about and even donated your time and resources towards the container that we began filling over a year ago. After many delays, it shipped a few months ago.  The great thing (for me) about these delays is that it now looks like we will now be able to be involved in some of the unpacking and distribution of these items.